growing up i can honestly say that i knew nothing of submission. i was taught to be strong, very independent, self-sufficient and mostly to not to take crap off of anyone.
if anyone ever had the pleasure to meet my mother, either of my grandmothers, or my aunts and cousins, you would understand why i say this.
it the mist of growing and learning i find it hard to "relearn" things. i had this conversation with my hoh the other day and it basically came down to the point of us "relearning" what we have been taught and what has been condition in us since birth.
i am "relearning" to ask permission for things (as an adult-this still is mind blowing) i'm "relearning" how to sit, how to speak, dress, and think. i am "relearning" that just because i practice all of these things in my life doesnt diminish the fact that i'm still strong, but just in a different way.
so as i stumble and "relearn" some of the basics i just ask that those around me please have patience.
2 comments:
hi jessica marie!
i know what you mean. it's difficult not only to undo what you've been taught, but also to do it in the context of everybody around you behaving in the way that you are trying to unlearn.
one hard thing for me has been to let go of swearing. it's hard to stop doing it when other people around use cuss words like a comma. i imagine it's like going to a foreign country and living there for awhile and picking up the accent, and then one day deciding you want to speak in your native accent. it's just difficult. i've only tripped up twice in the past two weeks, which is a huge victory for me.
when i screw up, i just remember something on one of my workout dvds. there is no success without failure.
hugs,
jade
that is very true. it's very hard to surround yourself with people who are trying to grow in the same direction that you are when you can never really say, uhmm this is what is happening in my life, and i'm doing this to grow closer to it.
i wish you luck with your journey. i was doing very well the last 3 weeks with no cursing and then yesterday and today i've slipped up.
jessica marie
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