childish behavior


during a recent conversation i had with my master and an assignment i realized how i manipulate things in order to get the outcome that i want. 

childish things done in order to insure that this is what he wants, childish things done out of fear of him saying, "uhmm, this isnt what i want"

i brought this to him, not the other way around and there are times that i wonder, i question even though despite the one or two missed punishments everything about our lifestyle would remind anyone of a 1950s household. 

my childish behavior i realize that i need to not only apologize for it but it has to stop. i guess admitting that you have a problem is the first step to recovery.

2 comments:

Brooke D said...

Hi Jessica,
I saw your link through submissive bliss today, and I wanted to po over and say hi. I am also beginning to work on my speech. I have a hard time not cursing when I am very upset, and I use slang words too often. You can't really *be* sweet if what comes out of your mouth isn't. It's funny that I just realized this in my late
20's! Good luck in your journey, I look forward to reading of your progress.

Blessings,

River

b's_girl said...

thank you so much for your encouragement and for reading. i love your blog.

jm